Liberty Routes - Your Guide to Living Abroad

# Staying Connected with Family Back Home: A Practical Guide for American Expats

In November 2018, researchers at Oregon Health & Science University published a finding every expat with aging parents should know. Tracking 1,424 Americans aged 60 and older, they found that those who used video chat — Skype, FaceTime — had roughly half the probability of depressive symptoms two years later. Email, instant messaging, and Facebook made no measurable difference ([OHSU News](https://news.ohsu.edu/2018/11/19/releases-20181119); [The American Journal of Geriatric Psychiatry](https://www.ajgponline.org/article/S1064-7481%2818%2930535-9/abstract)).

That result reframes what “staying in touch” means when you move abroad. The Association of Americans Resident Overseas estimates about 5.5 million Americans live outside the United States ([AARO](https://aaro.org/living-abroad/how-many-americans-live-abroad)); the State Department used a 9 million estimate for years before announcing it would stop publishing the figure ([Greenback Tax Services](https://www.greenbacktaxservices.com/blog/how-many-americans-live-abroad/)). However you count, millions of American families are now split across oceans, and the weekly video call is one of the few interventions shown to measurably protect the mental health of the people back home. The catch: it doesn't happen by accident across a 6-to-16-hour time difference. It happens because someone built a system. This article is about building that system.

Solve the Time-Zone Problem First

Most failed communication habits die the same death: “we kept missing each other.” Do the math once and design around it.

**Western Europe** runs 5 to 9 hours ahead of the continental US. Lisbon is 5 hours ahead of New York and 8 ahead of Los Angeles.
**Asia-Pacific is harder.** Tokyo is 13 hours ahead of New York during US daylight saving time; Bangkok is 11.
**The southern hemisphere swings.** Sydney is 14 hours ahead of New York in July but 16 in January, because the hemispheres shift clocks in opposite directions.

Daylight saving time adds a trap people usually discover by missing a call. In 2026, US clocks sprang forward on March 8, but the EU didn't follow until March 29; the EU falls back on October 25 while the US waits until November 1 ([timeanddate.com](https://www.timeanddate.com/time/dst/2026.html)). During those mismatch weeks, New York–Lisbon shrinks from 5 hours to 4, and a standing 7 p.m. call quietly becomes a 6 p.m. call.

Three practices handle nearly all of it:

**Pick one weekly anchor call** at an hour that works in both places. US weekend mornings pair naturally with evenings in Europe and Africa; US evenings pair with next-day mornings in Asia and Australia.
**Put it in a calendar with time-zone support.** Google Calendar and Apple Calendar both adjust correctly through DST mismatches; human memory does not.
**Recheck the slot four times a year** — at each US and destination clock change — and use timeanddate.com's Meeting Planner for one-off calls involving three or more time zones.

Keep a US Phone Number — Before You Board the Plane

Your US mobile number is not sentimental; it is authentication infrastructure. Banks, brokerages, credit card issuers, and the IRS's identity systems send verification codes to US numbers, and many will not accept a foreign one. Two approaches work.

**Port your number to Google Voice ($20, one-time).** Google charges a one-time $20 fee to port an eligible US mobile number to a personal Google Voice account ([Google Voice Help](https://support.google.com/voice/answer/1065667)). Start the port while you are still in the US, and do not cancel your carrier plan until Google confirms completion — canceling early can forfeit the number. Once ported, the number lives in the cloud with no monthly fee: calls, texts, and voicemail work over any internet connection, and Google confirms the number stays with you if you travel or move abroad ([Google Voice Help](https://support.google.com/voice/answer/7491761)). One warning: some institutions reject VoIP numbers for SMS verification. Test two-factor login on every critical account — bank, brokerage, IRS/ID.me — after porting and before your flight, and switch accounts to authenticator apps where offered.

**Or keep a cheap US plan and lean on Wi-Fi calling.** On T-Mobile, Wi-Fi calls to US numbers are free from abroad, while Wi-Fi calls to non-US numbers bill at international rates starting around $0.25 per minute ([T-Mobile](https://www.t-mobile.com/cell-phone-plans/international-roaming-plans)); AT&T and Verizon offer similar arrangements. The fine print matters: US consumer plans are written for people who live in the US, and carriers can flag or cancel lines that roam internationally for months on end. Treat this as a bridge for your first year, not a permanent setup.

Either way, get a local SIM or eSIM in your new country for daily life. The goal isn't replacing your US number — it's holding both.

Choose the Apps Your Family Actually Uses

The most common mistake is standardizing on the app you like. WhatsApp has more than 3 billion monthly active users worldwide and dominates daily life in much of Europe, Latin America, and Asia — India alone has over 535 million users ([Backlinko](https://backlinko.com/whatsapp-users)). It will probably dominate your new local life too. But only about 32% of US adults use it, according to Pew Research Center data ([DemandSage](https://www.demandsage.com/whatsapp-statistics/)). Your parents in Ohio are statistically on iMessage, Facebook Messenger, or plain SMS.

So split the difference deliberately:

**Meet your family on their platform.** If everyone back home has an iPhone, the family video call is FaceTime. Mixed devices? Google Meet, Zoom, or WhatsApp — whichever the least technical person already has.
**Do the setup before you leave.** The OHSU study's mental-health benefit came specifically from video chat, not from email or social media. Install the chosen app on your parents' devices yourself, put the shortcut on their home screen, and run two full test calls from another room.
**Know your data budget.** A one-on-one Zoom call uses roughly 540 MB per hour in standard definition, about 1.08 GB at 720p, and 1.62 GB at 1080p; audio-only uses just 27–36 MB per hour ([Allconnect](https://www.allconnect.com/blog/how-much-data-does-zoom-use)). On home broadband this is irrelevant. On a metered travel eSIM it's real money — when data is tight, drop to audio rather than skipping the call.

Build Asynchronous Habits Between Calls

With a 6-hour gap you can still call spontaneously. With a 13-hour gap, most connection has to be asynchronous — and that's fine, because async carries the context that makes live calls good. In InterNations' Expat Insider 2026 survey, 72% of expats said making local friends is hard ([Relocate Magazine](https://www.relocatemagazine.com/where-expats-struggle-where-they-thrive-in-2026-internations-0726)), which means your family thread will be your social floor for the first year. Invest in it:

**A low-bar family group chat.** The bar is a photo of lunch or a 20-second voice note. Voice memos deserve special mention: they cross time zones like text but carry tone like a call.
**A shared photo album.** Google Photos and iCloud both offer free shared albums; grandparents check them like a morning paper.
**A Wi-Fi digital photo frame** in your parents' house that you load remotely. It requires zero skill on their end — photos simply appear.
**Rituals with kids.** A grandparent in the US can read a bedtime story over video to grandchildren in Europe: 7 p.m. in Lisbon is 2 p.m. in New York. Turn-based apps — chess, word games — keep a running connection with older kids without scheduling anything.

The point of async isn't replacing calls. It's making sure the weekly call starts mid-conversation instead of with “so… what's new?”

Handle Mail and Packages Deliberately

Two flows need a plan: paper that must find you, and packages in both directions.

**Set up a virtual mailbox before you leave.** Services like Anytime Mailbox (plans from about $5.99–$9.99/month), iPostal1 (from $9.99), Traveling Mailbox (from $15), and US Global Mail (from $19.95) give you a real US street address; they scan envelopes, open and scan contents on request, and forward physical items abroad for a per-shipment fee that typically runs $10–80 ([Traveling Mailbox](https://travelingmailbox.com/pricing); [Anytime Mailbox](https://www.anytimemailbox.com/)). You'll complete USPS Form 1583, which requires notarization, to authorize the service — far easier to do while you're still in the US. This is how IRS correspondence, replacement bank cards, and state paperwork keep reaching you.

**Talk your family out of most care packages.** At 2026 retail rates, USPS Priority Mail International flat-rate shipping costs $32.65 for an envelope, $61.80 for a medium box, and $75.15 for a large box, with typical delivery in 6–10 business days ([USPS](https://www.usps.com/international/priority-mail-international.htm); [Shippo](https://goshippo.com/shipping/usps-priority-mail-international)). Then customs takes its cut: the EU, for example, applies import charges to gifts between private individuals above a €45 value threshold ([European Commission](https://taxation-customs.ec.europa.eu/buying-goods-online-coming-non-european-union-country_en)). For most occasions, ordering from a retailer inside your country of residence or giving digitally beats shipping. Reserve the $60 box for things that genuinely can't be bought locally — a child's artwork, the key ingredient in a family recipe, the t-shirt from the reunion.

Treat Visits Like Infrastructure, Not Vacations

Some things only happen in person. Three rules keep visits functioning as the backbone of family relationships:

**Book the next visit before the current one ends.** A known date changes the emotional math on both sides — “see you in June” lands differently than “see you sometime.”
**Anchor visits to fixed events.** Holidays, birthdays, reunions: annual events self-schedule and self-justify, which halves the negotiation overhead.
**Check passports early for family visiting you.** Many countries require a passport valid for six months beyond the stay, a rule the State Department flags on its country information pages ([travel.state.gov](https://travel.state.gov/content/travel/en/international-travel.html)). A parent discovering an expired passport eight weeks before a planned trip is a preventable disaster.

Also keep an emergency-travel plan: know your fastest routing home, keep a card with enough headroom for a last-minute transatlantic fare, and decide in advance which events you fly back for.

Action Checklist

**Before departure (the items with deadlines):**

Port your number to Google Voice ($20) or confirm your carrier's Wi-Fi-calling setup; test SMS verification on bank, brokerage, and IRS accounts afterward.
Set up a virtual mailbox and get USPS Form 1583 notarized while a US notary is a 10-minute errand.
Install and test the family video app on relatives' devices; put the shortcut on their home screens.
Agree on the weekly anchor call slot and create the recurring calendar event with time zones attached.
Create the shared photo album and add everyone.

**First month abroad:**

Run the anchor call at the agreed time at least twice before adjusting it.
Start the group-chat habit yourself — post daily even when nobody replies at first.
Ship the digital photo frame to your parents and load the first batch of photos.

**Ongoing:**

Recheck the call time at every clock change — up to four per year across hemispheres.
Book the next visit before ending the current one.
Use each visit as a tech-support window: fix, update, and teach one new tool per trip.

The Next Step

Two items on that list are genuinely hard to fix after wheels-up: porting your number and notarizing the mailbox form. If your move is still ahead of you, do those this week. If you're already abroad, start with the cheapest, highest-yield change — put one recurring video call on the calendar with the time zones set correctly, and send the invite tonight. The OHSU data is blunt about what works: not the likes, not the status updates — the face on the screen, on a schedule. Build the system once, and staying close stops depending on everyone's good intentions across eleven time zones.